Who is your Role Model

I should start by warning you that I am in a pissy mood this morning. I have no idea why I’m in a mood – it’s Friday and life’s going great. I even lost a half pound since Monday. I should be having a great day BUT I’m not. So instead of a rah rah blog today I’ve decided to share with you something that happened to me last week.

I was listening to the audio book I talked about a few days ago People are Idiots and one of the tasks Larry assigns is that you write the answer to the questions he asks. One of the questions became problematic for me. The question was to make a list of your role models in each of the areas of life where you set goals and/or have concerns.

I set out to make my list – not only to name the role models but to describe what I can (or have) learned from them. So I realized I have a role model for dieting, one for exercise, a couple for my day job work, two for relationships and two for money management. Then I realized that for one subject, what may be the most important part of my future and goals – writing – I do not have a role model.

I sat down at considered all the writers whose work I admire and all the writers I know personally who are either writing for passion or writing to make a living. And after taking a look I realized that they don’t inspire me in a mentor sort of way. The professional writers I admire who have published tens or hundreds of books seem too out of reach or too lucky to be reasonable role models for me and the writers who aren’t big names, don’t seem to strive high enough to be a mentor or role model.

Understand my critique is not that a viable role model doesn’t exist. Instead my concern is that with all the viable options that do exist, none of them inspire me. The flaw and lack of motivation is in me, not the role model. Yet I’m still seeking a passionate writer who I can admire and model my behavior habits after.

What about you? Who are your role models?What can you learn from them?

Read Often and Read Well

If you’ve read much of this blog you might have realized that I love to read. I’m not a book snob because I read everything. I have read my share of fine and formal literature but I am just as likely to read the newest self help book or Nora Roberts romance. In fact in most instances I’d rather curl up with a Nora Roberts, Janet Evanovich or Christine Feehan novel than American Idol or Gray’s Anatomy.

I’ve read the South Beach book, the Zone book, 7 Habits and any other self improvement type book. I’m even a bigger fan of audio books in the self help realm. Last week I listened to

People are Idiots and I Can Prove It

by Larry Winget. I listened while working on a project at work and laughed my way through the book. Even though Larry is a funny guy with a sharp sense of humor, I appreciate his books because he offers honest and brutal advice just when I need it.

While you might not care about what I like to read, I'm hoping that you have books you prefer. One of the joys of being in our 30s is that we get to explore life and anything that interests us. Books are a great option for self discovery so I say read well, read often and read for fun.

(Normal) Read Rational, Adult Relationships

Last weekend I talked to one of my friends about relationships. This friend is 28 and seems to be working hard to get her life in order. She is a mom with a 4 year old, was divorced last year after 4 years of marriage. She has a great job as a magazine editor that suits her personality perfectly. She has a great boyfriend and they share a normal, adult (read non-drama-filled) relationship.

From the outside it looks like my friend has the perfect life. She doesn’t. What she has is a normal life and for the first time, she is thriving in the normal.

When we talked about relationships I came to the realization that quite possibly one of the greatest things about turning 30 is the ability or expectation of having “normal” or rational relationships.

Once we reach our 30s many of us have had our fill of drama and game playing when it comes to men. This isn’t always the case but if you are the type who is tired of the drama, the great news is that many men are in the same place. For once you are more likely to agree with the men you date about boundaries, rules and how to have your own life. Jealousy begins to be a hazard instead of an appealing aspect of your relationship.

What my friend shared with me is that she and the guy in her life have separate lives. They have their own friends, jobs and responsibility. When they get together they are together. The thing that stands out is how they deal with the other people in each other’s lives. For example, they each have friends of the opposite sex who they’ve known forever and these friends will hug and kiss them if they happen to run into each other.

In our 20s the thought of your boyfriend hugging or kissing another girl is enough to send most women into a jealous rage that causes a fight and possibly even a breakup of epic proportions. As we get older, jealousy (hopefully) is not our first emotion and we think before we lose it. Instead my friend and her guy respect the friendships and get to know the other’s friends without all the drama.

The funny thing is that my friend kept telling me how odd it is to be in a relationship that is so adult, so normal. I just responded that she just found one of the greatest benefits of getting older and wiser – adult relationships.

The BAD News Stereotypes

Just to show that I am not a Pollyanna who only sees the good in things (and people) I’ve dedicated this morning to the stereotypes and the reasons why “society” tells us that turning 30 is a negative.

Your body will fall apart
You won’t be able to have children
More women are in therapy at 30 than any other age
Men only want young, skinny women
Your best years are behind you
You can no longer run, dive, enter beauty pageants, become a ballerina, start modeling professionally, become a celebrity, etc.
Prodigies will surpass you at work
You have to make sacrifices to have it all
You are getting old
You are no longer interesting
You can no longer have fresh ideas
Your friends are all coupled up and have no time for you
Babies, bottles and burping is all you have to look forward to
You are now on the assembly line of hard work for little satisfaction
You have to work at work you hate

This list is just a few of the things I heard in the two years before I turned 30.

My hope is that after reading this list you’ve come to one conclusion. These are RIDICULOUS and so far from your reality that there is no reason to fear turning 30 any longer.

Lists, Lists, I Must Make Lists

To get a boost of motivation for the new year, let’s think about what is fabulous about turning 30.

I know what I want
I know what I love
I know who I am
My pay is on level with my education and experience
I had the chance to experiment and have fun in my 20s
I expect to be treated as an adult, and I am
I can afford to pay my bills and buy what I like
I no longer have to work entry level (unless I want to)
I have confidence
I can change careers if I want
I can sleep late
I can spend Saturday in my pajamas if I want
I don't have to have roommates

These are just a few of my personal benefits of being in my 30s.
What is on your list??

Back on Track

I’m sure I’ve said it before – I will get back on track. I’ve been a little lacking in motivation the past few months. I’d like to say the holidays were just too busy but in reality I just had a period of not caring.

We all go through periods of time when we just want to get through the day. We don’t want to be creative or energized or do anything impressive. We just want to get up, do the bare minimum of what we are obligated to do then go back to bed. This is where I’ve been since November.

I’m not suggesting that this is good or bad. Sometimes our motivation needs to shut down so that we can reevaluate before we are ready to start new. I’m optimistic that I am now ready to start again. So we are getting back on track for this blog. I still believe that our 30s are a great (though busy) time. So this week to get back on track, I plan to start making lists. Great big lists of the things that matter, the things that inspire and maybe even the reasons behind the goals I’ve set for the next few months.

You see, I am a goal setter and when I start a new project (like 2009) I like to set goals, outline the process for reaching the goals and then get started. So bear with me for a few days while I get back in a routine.

So WELCOME BACK to the 30 ISN’T OLD blog and

WELCOME TO YOUR 30s!

Happy New Year

Welcome to 2009!

If you will turn 30 in 2009,

get excited now!

You have found the blog to help you motivate, get interested and learn to value what an awesome year you will have turning 30.

Welcome to the site. Please send in comments, suggestions and any insights you have during this year.