Searching at 30something

I came across another blog about 30, this one for those who have passed the birthday and are looking to the future.

Check out http://30somethingandsearching.today.com/

This 30 something female from Chicago invites readers into her life for discussions on a range of topics including (some of my favorites)
Granny panties
What Not to Wear's Stacy & Clinton
Customized perfume
Greeting - hugs or kisses
Matchmakers (I have to remember to devote an entire entry to this one later)

What I like about Kelly (the author) is that she admits that she is still searching & she doesn't apologize for not being settled at 32. She is still searching for the right career path, husband and children (all somewhere and sometime in the future). Along the way she is searching for her spiritual path and for happiness. What more can you ask for from a blogger???

If you are searching for some new inspiration of a woman who is beyond 30, no longer thinking about that birthday, and just living life while trying to find her way, CHECK OUT that blog.

Memphis & Graceland

I mentioned yesterday that I was in Memphis last week. I played tourist and went to Graceland one afternoon. It was like stepping into a time warp with the 70s decor and memorabilia from the life of Elvis Presley.

I realized something while I was there. Elvis Presley, the King of Rock N' Roll, died August 16, 1977 - more than 30 years ago. In that time he is still a hero to many. I visited on a Monday afternoon and the tour bus was constantly moving between the entrance and Graceland itself. After 30 years Elvis is still remembered and treasured enough that people visit his home.

Elvis cut his first record before the age of 20. By 31 he was a star of rock n' roll music. Within 2 years he was seen regularly on the movie screen. His career declined and was ready for a comeback by his mid 30s. Unfortunately all that success signaled a short life and Elvis passed in his 40s.

Fans wonder to this day what greatness would Elvis have achieve if he had held his life together and lived longer. What music would he have made? Would his daughter's life have turned out differently? What about his fans? Would they have lost interest as he aged or would he have stayed an icon?

We can never know what would have happened. Still it isn't the mystery that makes millions visit Graceland. It is the life lived.

You and I may never be Elvis. We may never live a life on such a grand scale. Still, will the life you lived be worth remembering when you are gone?

As long we live life instead of dreading it, we have a better chance of a life well lived.

I'm back

I've managed to find my way home and back to this blog. I should apologize for being away. I was attending a training session in Memphis (yes I managed a trip to Graceland) and for some reason I could get a network connection on my laptop, I just couldn't keep it long enough to get posts written and posted.

Technology is not my friend - ever!

So while spending way too much time in airports and cursing my computer this week I had a thought about technology. Again I should remind you that I am a technophobe. I use computers because I have to but that doesn't mean I have to like it.

I'm also a big fan of the television, enough so that if left to my own devices I would get home from work at 515p and plant myself in front of some mindless show until I was falling asleep at 11p. In that time I would ignore the phone, forget to eat dinner and blow off any projects I should be working on (including this blog). SO, what to do about an addiction to television and mindless technology??

I turned it off. My pretty 42" LCD high-definition TV just sits in my living room, looking decorative but not useful because last month I had the cable turned off (and I don't have an antenna to get regular network TV). Believe it or not, I've done OK without the set. I do however watch some shows on my computer but I'm at about 4 hours a week instead of 4 a night.

Sorry for the TV ramble. Where was I. OH yes - technology.

I was thinking about how technology has changed in the last 30 years.
flat panel TV
cell phones
personal computers (to laptops then PDAs)
CDs
DVDs
Blu-ray
High Definition
Atari - Nintendo - PlayStation
the Internet
Space shuttle missions
GPS
Prozac & Ritalin
iPod & MP3


I wonder what we will see next??
Total lack of Internet privacy
All TV, on demand
Wrist watch computers (these are pretty close)
Cars that fly and talk (as well as keep us from getting lost)
Terminator like robots that destroy humanity
True virtual reality & hologram rooms

What do you think? Where will the next 30 years take us with technology??

Out of touch

Sorry for being out of touch for a few days. Unfortunately, it's going to be a bit longer. I'm traveling for my day job and have VERY limited access to the internet.

I will catch up over the weekend.

Until then, HAVE A GREAT DAY!

Choices

Something I spent a lot of time researching early on is making choices. When stressed or anxious about facing 30, we are often consumed with questions about the choices we've made. In second guessing ourselves, we are questioning several things:

Did I make the right choice?

Why did I choose one thing over another?

Am I who I want to be?
If not, why not?

It is easy to question the big choices - about getting an education or going surfing, having children or waiting, getting married to the guy you thought you loved or even getting divorced when things were not working out. Big life choices are not made once, they tend to be made every day. When you decide to get married, you continue to make that choice from the day you said yes to the day you said I Do and beyond. The choice to have a spouse is one you can reverse. You can get a divorce. So in reality you chose to get married and you continue to choose to stay married.

This same cannot be said for having children. They are yours once you have them. However, you can choose what kind of parent you will be. If you choose to make your children a priority, you have to continue to choose that each day. Or you can choose to let someone else take responsibility or you can just do the bare minimum to raise your family.

Choices are often difficult and can create regret. The thing about regret though is that it is useless. Regret does nothing for your life. It makes you doubt yourself and dislike yourself and your life. Instead of regret, consider making a new choice. Change your mind and seek a different path or just choose to be happy with the path. Continue each day to make choices that you love.

Thinking about love

Today I was thinking about love. Don't ask me why. It isn't usually on my radar. Don't misunderstand, I've got nothing against the big romance. I just don't often have time to think about it.

OK, so I do know why I've been thinking about it today. Last week I accomplished a goal. Yeah me! The reward I promised myself for meeting this goal is to have some free reading time. Instead of investing time in something literary or interesting that will capture my brain. I've headed down the easy entertainment route. I'm rereading one of my favorite series of books - JD Robb's In Death series.

I started with book one and now I'm on the second. The thing about these novels is that while they are futuristic crime novels, there's a serious love at the core of this series. There are more than 25 books in this series. What I've forgotten in the past few years of reading about an established couple was how they began. In reading the early books I've found the push and pull, the fight of falling in love.

So this round about tale was telling you I've been thinking about love today. What I've been thinking is does love change as we get older?

There is teenage love and early college/young adult love but what happens after that? Can we find great love as we get older? Is there ever a time when love runs out? Or when our ability to find it has passed?

Don't get me wrong. I know there are plenty of loves left in my life. I KNOW that 30 is young to start wondering about such things. Some people haven't even experienced love by 30, others may be on their second or third love.

What do you think?

Does love have a time limit?

Does age have anything to do with love?

Turning 30 means I will never have to do ???(fill in the blank) again

Let's play a little game. I'm feeling a bit chipper today. Take out a piece of paper so you can make a list. This will be a short activity. If you are pressed for time then set a timer for 5 minutes. Take a deep breath then for 5 solid minutes write everything that comes to your mind. Writers call this a bit of free writing. EXCEPT this activity is more like guided writing.

Write the statement
Turning 30 means I will never have to do __________ again.

Now for 5 minutes. Fill in the blank.

Ready? GO!

Help anyone move
Wear a belly bearing top (unless I have fab abs)
Learn to drive
Get carded (really, it never happens anymore)
Be embarrassed to be out drinking with my mom
Explain to my parents where I was the night before
Never be told I’m too young to know what I want
Never be told I am too young (for anything)
The splits or back bends to impress my friends
Try on clothes with someone else in the dressing room with me
Let someone else pick out my clothes (unless I want to)
Wear a bikini top to school (or a concert)
Sit in a tiny desk chair
Beg my brother to cover for me when I'm late
Borrow the family car
Ask permission - for anything

This is my list. After 5 short minutes. I'm sure I could come up with more if I spent time thinking about it. Anyway, what I learned from this exercise is a bit about what matters to me. -

Independence, freedom and not wearing skimpy clothes

See turning 30 can be a very, very good thing!!