Happy Tat

A few weeks ago I mentioned that I was searching for a new tattoo. I decided to spend much of my Labor Day enjoying the fruits of someone else’s creative labors.

I made a visit to Sailor Bill’s Tattoo Time in FL. http://www.tattoo-time.com/ where Jared created something new that I am very pleased with. I can only show a partial picture because it circles my wrist and won’t show well in 2D. Let’s just say, I’m happy and it looks great.

After getting the tat I spoke with my friend Noelle who commented that she’s glad because “A new tattoo always makes you happy for a long while.” What a great observation from a friend who really knows me. She is totally correct.

A few hundred dollars, four hours and pretty new artwork set my world to rights again.

Of course I started thinking about the other simple things that tend to make me smile. Here they are, feel free to add your own simple pleasures.

Rainbows
The smell after a Florida thunderstorm
New flip flops
Hot water
Cheese puffs
The right song at the right moment
The light feeling after a haircut
Finding a great shirt that’s been hidden at the back of my closet
Texture of book pages
Ten dollar dangle earrings

With the strife, turmoil and frustration of life, isn’t it great that there are some things that can make you smile? What simple pleasures make you happy?

Singular Questions

Do you ever look around at the couples you know or people you meet and wonder how they are married when you are still single?

These tend to be the people we compare ourselves to. They may be people we grew up with, went to college with or even those we work with. Often they are close to us in age but because they are married and/or have kids, they seem to live on a distant planet.


This rarely happens to me personally because I'm aware of all 101 reasons why I'm single. Most days, I'm very glad about my single life. So much so that a friend suggested my next book should be title "Marriage, divorce and why I stay single." I'm contemplating the idea.

Recently though I've heard comments from friends, people I've met and even random women shopping in Target.

The comments I overhear are the most telling (even catty) and go something like this:

"How can she be married?"
"Who would marry him?"
"We dated in college and I knew he'd never settle down and now they've got a baby on the way."

What's barely visible underneath all this is the comment that should be heard.

"Why them and not me?"

I'm not suggesting we are a culture of selfish people but the closer we get to 30, the more often I hear these comments. 30 seems to be the age we start to wonder if we'll ever have the life we dreamed of when we were playing Barbies in elementary school.

If you've noticed your own comments edging toward catty lately it might be time to ask yourself a few simple questions.

Do you want to be married?
Don't go with your first instinct on this without true consideration. Many women find they expect to be married because it is culturally expected, not because it's really what they want.

What's stopping you from finding wedded bliss?
There are no good men out there is not a real answer here. Half the marriages I know were a matter of timing more than perfection or finding a soul mate.

Have you turned down a real opportunity?
This last question is often the most important. You might realize that YOU are what's keeping you from partnering up. You might have unrealistic requirements, unvoiced commitment fears or even just not be ready to tie the knot.

Spend a little time getting in touch with your answers and you might find there's no need for catty comments or comparisons.

Tattoo Ideas

Lately it seems that several people I know are in the market for a new tattoo. I've read several conversations with friends on Facebook and I've been reminded (again) of my own itch for some new body art.

I love my tattoos. At the moment I have 7 and have plans for a full back tattoo to tie several of my present tattoos into a single mosaic piece. I got my first ink when I was 19. In my 20s I added to the collection every few years when I had some free cash. The one thing my 20s tats all had in common is that they could be hidden.

Since 21 I've worked in a conservative industry and I've always played by the rules. This means no visible tattoos. My normal work clothes, khaki pants and short sleeve polo shirts could hide all of my art. Frequently when people find out about my tats they are very surprised. Apparently I'm not the type to have tats, even though they're popular these days.

The thing is, I've always been the type. I wanted one at 14 and by the time I got my first, I was desperate to be inked.

A couple years ago, soon after I turned 30, I got tattoo number seven. The first of my tats that is visible most of the time. It's a small tat that covers the top of my left wrist. Turned sideways the image of a couple intertwined is visible. But to most catching a quick glimpse, the tat resembles a flower or abstract design.

What makes this tat different is that once I hit 30 I stopped caring about covering or hiding my tattoos, even in the workplace. I stopped making my tattoo choices based upon what I could hide or keep from customers or even future employers.

Now I'm working on designing my next piece of artwork and my view is the same. I want art that looks pretty and represents who I am. I don't care whether it suits my work or not. I guess if I'm ordered to wear long sleeves and cover up, I will but until then, my 3os have freed me, given me the confidence to do my thing, my way.

Personal Anthem

I've been thinking about music today, don't ask me why. My iPod says my favorite song is Angel by Sinead O'Connor because it is by far (x10) my most played song. But I'm thinking If You're Going Through Hell by Rodney Atkins is the real song of my life right now.

This got me thinking about how music is such a part of life. I identify many of the important events in my life just by the music I related to most at the time. Some examples might be cliched by here goes

I Will Survive (Gloria Gaynor) - after many a break up
Eye of the Tiger (Survivor) - at the gym
Dancing Queen (ABBA) - pretty much every Wednesday night during college
It's My Life (Bon Jovi) - early career - when I needed a reason to stay motivated to succeed
Something More (Sugarland) - 2004 working Hail and Hurricanes
Should've Been a Cowboy (Toby Keith) - after a high school break up
Dog & Butterfly (Heart) - after a college break up

Then there are the songs that make me feel great no matter what
Switch (Will Smith)
Jack & Diane (John Cougar)
Keep on Loving You (The Donnas)
Love Bites (Def Leppard)
Brown Eyed Girl (Jimmy Buffett version)
I Want Love (Elton John) - Although I think I just love the video for this one

This is just a quick list I composed off the top of my head so I'm sure I've forgotten some powerful tunes. The point of the list is that all I needed to do was think of these songs and my mood became better.

I've found many options for personal anthems for my life. These are just a few, with Rodney Atkins taking first place at the moment. But just having a list like this helps motivate me through stress, crabby mornings or any other moody day.

What song motivates you?
Do you have a personal anthem?
Find your special song (or songs) and start moving with a smile on your face.

Are your Tired or Bored?

Lately the only thing I've wanted at the end of the day is to crawl into bed. By end of the day, I'm talking 5 or 6 in the evening, as soon as I get home from work. Weekends have been rotated between laundry, naps and reading books I've read before. I started to get a little concerned about my lazy cravings once they lasted longer than one week.

Then I began thinking. Maybe I'm tired because I've been sleeping in hotels too often (2 weeks a month). Or maybe I'm tired because I have a busy and somewhat stressful job.

Of course, the reality is a little closer to - Maybe I'm just BORED.

I've caught myself playing Spider Solitaire in front of the TV for hours at a time. I've stared into space wishing for something interesting to read. Nothing has seemed to interest me as I walked the rut of the last few months.

Having a busy life doesn't mean having an interesting one. As we stretch into our 30s with work, family and community commitments, we become constantly busy and always on the move. Yet at the same time restlessness and irritation also set in. If we waste much of our time with all the things we have to do (or feel obligated to do) then we have little time for the things that truly interest us. As I've strayed further from what I love, I feel more exhausted and bored.

What's the solution for our 30s?
Should we work less? Live more? Or give up sleep to find time for everything we must do and want to do?

I'm still trying to decide. I'll have more energy when I find a choice that works.

Try new things

We are never too old to try new things. I get this from my 70-something year old grandmother who is off to Australia and New Zealand in a few weeks. She's been there before but she found an interesting activity in the area she hasn't done before so she just has to go now.

I'm lucky in that I have a visible reminder of how young 30 really is. With grandparents in the 70s and 80s plus a great-grandmother in her 90s, I've gotten to see how long life really can be. Those family members who manage to keep a youthful appearance and personality are the ones who are always willing to try something new. So instead of dreading 30, I chose to look forward to it as just one more new experience in life.

Now that I'm comfortable as an over-30 woman (33 to be exact) I'm still looking for the next new things. This week my newest thing is a great sugar scrub from The Body Shop and a book to inspire laughs, "And Here's the Kicker" about comedy writers.

Last week the new thing I tried was driving the Nissan Cube – a horrid vehicle that I suggest no one attempt to try. I also made my first visit to my father's home town, Grand Rapids, Michigan. I was in the area for work but I did a little wandering to get an impression of where dad comes from. I found that the area looked much like the Tampa, Florida community where dad grew up after leaving Michigan at age 5. The odd similarity made me realize why my grandparents easily fit in when they moved south.

Trying new things doesn't have to be dramatic, just constant (or at least frequent). When was the last time you tried something new?

If you cannot recall, it's time to consider a change. Order a new cocktail at happy hour, try a new dinner recipe or switch your nail polish to a more vibrant shade. Just think small and get started trying new things. You might find these are the best times in life.

 

Back in the Swing

I've been out of touch for a while. Unfortunately, my craptastic day turned into a couple of very busy and very irritating weeks. I just wasn't up to being positive. You might have noticed that when possible, I try not to let this blog become my personal rant session. This past week or two, I chose to avoid writing instead of indulging in my inner cry baby.

Now, I'm hoping I'm ready to get back into the swing of things and back on schedule. I'm in Chicago for a few days this week. The flight here was uneventful, if you don't mind a few dozen little kids screaming about wanting to go back to Disney (instead of heading home). To avoid the screamers, I indulged in a few hours of iPod immersion.

Skipping through my over 3000 songs, I realized how much music is a part of the major events in our lives. You might remember the music playing the first time you kissed a boy, the first time you got drunk at a bar, or even the tune playing as you celebrated your last birthday.

Today I gravitated toward songs that make me want to move. A little Fergie, Abba and Christina Aguilera just to name a few. I recalled that for my 30th birthday I chose soothing tunes in line with the spa theme. But if I hadn't celebrated this way, I wonder what music would have permeated the night.

What about you? What music will you choose for your celebration??